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Essay on Interpersonal Skills

Students are often asked to write an essay on Interpersonal Skills in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Interpersonal Skills

Introduction.

Interpersonal skills are abilities that help us interact and communicate with others. They are vital in school, work, and life.

Types of Interpersonal Skills

Importance of interpersonal skills.

These skills are important because they help us work in teams, solve problems, and build relationships. They also help us communicate effectively.

Improving Interpersonal Skills

We can improve these skills by practicing active listening, being respectful, and working well in teams. It’s a lifelong process but worth the effort.

250 Words Essay on Interpersonal Skills

Introduction to interpersonal skills, the importance of interpersonal skills.

Interpersonal skills are a cornerstone of effective communication, teamwork, and leadership. They are essential in understanding others’ perspectives, resolving conflicts, and building strong relationships. In the professional sphere, these skills are often the difference between successful and unsuccessful individuals, as they facilitate collaboration and promote a positive work environment.

Interpersonal skills encompass various abilities. Active listening is one, enabling one to understand and respond effectively to others. Empathy, another crucial skill, allows one to recognize and respond to others’ emotions. Other skills include verbal and non-verbal communication, problem-solving, decision-making, and negotiation.

Developing Interpersonal Skills

Developing interpersonal skills requires self-awareness, practice, and feedback. It involves understanding one’s communication style, recognizing its impact on others, and adapting it to different situations. Regular practice through social interactions and seeking constructive feedback can significantly improve these skills.

In conclusion, interpersonal skills are vital in both personal and professional life. They enable effective communication, foster relationships, and facilitate teamwork. By understanding and improving these skills, one can enhance their social interactions and achieve their goals.

500 Words Essay on Interpersonal Skills

Interpersonal skills, often referred to as people skills, entail the ability to interact effectively and harmoniously with others. They encompass a broad spectrum of abilities, including communication, empathy, active listening, and conflict resolution. In today’s interconnected world, these skills are more crucial than ever, whether in personal relationships, professional environments, or community engagements.

Key Components of Interpersonal Skills

Communication.

Effective communication is the cornerstone of interpersonal skills. It involves both verbal and non-verbal cues, such as body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions. Good communicators articulate their thoughts clearly, listen attentively, and respond appropriately.

Empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, is a vital interpersonal skill. It promotes mutual respect and consideration, fostering a more compassionate and supportive environment.

Conflict Resolution

Self-awareness.

Understanding one’s strengths and weaknesses is the first step in developing interpersonal skills. This awareness allows individuals to identify areas for improvement and monitor progress.

In conclusion, interpersonal skills are essential in our daily lives, affecting all areas from personal relationships to professional success. They involve a range of abilities, including communication, empathy, and conflict resolution. Developing these skills requires self-awareness, practice, and feedback. By honing these skills, individuals can enhance their interactions, improve their relationships, and contribute positively to their communities.

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Essential Interpersonal Skills Everyone Should Develop

Sometimes called “soft skills” or “people skills,” these tools are key to creating and maintaining a successful career.

Lisa Bertagnoli

“She’s a people person.” You’ve heard a colleague, manager, friend or relative described that way and you know exactly what it means. This person eases through the workday like a soft summer breeze, feathers rarely ruffled, hackles seldom raised. 

13 Essential Interpersonal Skills

Communication, active listening, emotional intelligence, relational intelligence, decision making, collaboration, objective effectiveness, problem solving, conflict resolution, negotiation.

What’s their secret? Finely developed and assiduously deployed interpersonal skills. “Interpersonal skills are often referred to as ‘people skills’ or ‘social skills,’” said Roberta Matuson, president of Matuson Consulting and author of Can We Talk? Seven Principles for Managing Difficult Conversations at Work. 

What Are Interpersonal Skills? 

“In a nutshell, interpersonal skills are the skills that help us work well with others,” said John Waldmann, CEO and founder of Homebase , a San Francisco, California-based company that makes a time-tracking and employee scheduling app. “They’re the competencies we use to communicate, solve problems, be a part of a team, and move people and projects forward,” Waldmann said.  

“Developing your interpersonal skills, while it may seem touchy-feely, can be an important aspect of your career growth into leadership and roles with a greater scope of responsibility.” - Patrick Hayes, chief strategy officer, UncommonX, Chicago

Interpersonal skills come naturally to some people, but they can be developed and improved with time, experience and even training programs, Waldmann said. In the early days of Homebase, he said he found it “uncomfortable” to pitch the business. “But the more I practiced, the better I got,” he said. “Without taking the chance on developing those skills — communication, curiosity, empathy, adaptability and a lot of perseverance — Homebase wouldn’t be where it is today.”

Interpersonal skills work together as a package. It’s difficult to excel at one skill without excelling at the others. For instance, communication involves verbal and nonverbal skills as well as listening. Listening, “the ability to truly hear what people are saying,” Matuson said, is difficult without emotional intelligence , which is the ability to comprehend and handle emotions. Decision making and problem solving are entwined, as are collaboration and teamwork.

Employers value strong interpersonal skills because they help teams function more effectively,” said Jill Bowman, director of people at New York-based fintech company Octane . Interpersonal skills such as active listening, collaboration, empathy, team building, negotiation and leadership develop over time and can be improved with practice and training, Bowman said.

13 Interpersonal Skills Examples

“How we share ourselves in words and spoken thoughts, express through our physical reactions via body language and actively seek to understand others through listening are crucial to building other interpersonal/soft skills such as teamwork, conflict resolution and negotiation,” said Jamie Johnson, career advisor at the University of Phoenix . Well-developed communication skills create foundational people skills required to successfully interact with others and build fresh and positive personal and professional connections, Johnson added.

“Having the self confidence and conviction to make yourself heard allows you to increase collaboration with others and be an advocate in fostering your own success.” - Meighan (Meg) Newhouse, Inspirant Group, Naperville, Illinois

Communication requires both verbal and nonverbal skills. Verbal skills are the ability to articulate, in writing and while speaking, what you’re thinking, what you need and what you want to contribute, said Meighan (Meg) Newhouse, CEO and cofounder at Inspirant Group , a management consulting company based in Naperville, Illinois. 

“Having the self confidence and conviction to make yourself heard allows you to increase collaboration with others and be an advocate in fostering your own success,” Newhouse said, adding that the best way to develop this skill is to push through fear and “just do it.” 

Nonverbal skills include making eye contact, proper body language (for instance, arms not crossed in a defensive stance) and gestures, all of which can make a difference in people feeling engaged and comfortable, Newhouse said. 

Ever talk to someone whose mind seems to be on everything but what you’re saying? Active listening means engaging with the person with whom you’re talking, not just listening with one ear as you formulate what to say in response.

Active listening is crucial in the workplace, where people must interact in order to overcome challenges, said Mike Grossman, CEO of GoodHire , a Redwood City, California-based company that runs background checks on prospective employees. Active listening involves nonverbal communication, including uncrossed arms, maintaining eye contact and leaning in toward the speaker, Grossman said. 

Strong active listening also means asking specific questions about what the speaker is saying, as well as verbally affirming that you’re paying attention without interrupting the speaker’s train of thought, Grossman said. “This conveys engagement and gives you a fundamentally deeper understanding of the topic being discussed,” he said. 

More on Soft Skills How to Advance Your Tech Career With Nontechnical Skills

Relational intelligence is the ability to successfully connect with people and build strong, long-lasting relationships, said Adam Bandelli , an organizational psychologist who has pioneered the concept and written a book, Relational Intelligence: The Five Essential Skills You Need to Build Life-Changing Relationships , about it. 

It’s the everything bagel of interpersonal skills, encompassing establishing rapport, understanding others, embracing individual differences, developing trust, cultivating influence and serving others.

• Establishing rapport requires making a strong first impression, finding similarities and common ground, and creating a safe and enjoyable space for people to have a positive connection.

• Understanding others requires “good self-awareness and EQ, being curious and inquisitive, and actively listening to others,” Bandelli said. “It’s about being intentional in putting in the time and energy to get to know people on a deep level.”

• Embracing individual differences means understanding and accepting that people might be different from you, and those differences, be they sexual orientation, gender, ethnicities, race, religion or socioeconomic background, are what makes teams strong. 

• Developing trust requires commitment, consistency, character, courage and integrity. “Leaders need to continually deposit into a bank account of trust to build a sense of camaraderie and commitment from their people,” Bandelli said, noting that employees tend to stay with companies when they have a sound relationship with leaders. Once trust is gained, “you can’t use it to manipulate, control or use people” he said. “Trust is not about controlling your people.”

• Cultivating influence means having a positive and meaningful impact on people, whether it’s teammates, direct reports or the entire organization. To develop this part of relational intelligence, find a mentor who has superb interpersonal skills, Bandelli said. 

• Practicing these five essential relational intelligence skills is about servant leadership. No matter their place on the organizational chart, “great leaders know that serving their people leads to higher levels of performance, goals and objectives are attained, KPIs are delivered, and organizations achieve great financial success and profitability,” Bandelli said.

Effectively responding to challenges and questions and offering well-thought-out and convincing evidence and responses is part of the interpersonal/soft skills tool bag, said Johnson of University of Phoenix. 

The art of persuasion is as much about gaining a new perspective as it is convincing someone to your side or “winning” an argument: “They may provide valuable insight into issues and may give you the ability to voice your thoughts and opinions in a situation that can provide another perspective,” Johnson said. 

You need emotional intelligence to manage and leverage your and other people’s emotions, said Donna McGeorge , a productivity coach based in Australia. “It is the ability to understand the way people feel and react, monitor your own state and to use this to make good judgments and to avoid or solve problems,” she said. Developing emotional intelligence builds strong workplace relationships that will help you and your team achieve your goals.

The building blocks of emotional intelligence are self regulation, which is managing your feelings, emotions and behavior in healthy ways, including adapting when necessary; self awareness, or knowing your strengths and weaknesses; other awareness, which is picking up emotional cues and group dynamics and having empathy for the needs of others; building and maintaining relationships via clear communication, McGeorge said.  

It’s how we identify and choose among alternatives and is closely related to problem solving, McGeorge said. Decision-making is far from the rational process we might believe it is, she added, citing a 2000 study by social psychologists Jennifer Lerner and Dacher Kelter. The two found that “fearful people made pessimistic judgments of future events and angry people made optimistic judgments,” the report said. “In other words, we are at risk of making dumb decisions when we are not in full control of our emotions,” McGeorge said. 

Information overload, which results in the illusion of knowledge, incomplete information, or even being under deadline pressure can result in poor decisions, McGeorge said. Lack of sleep, too, has a “tremendous impact” on decision-making, she said. Finally, being bombarded with decisions to make can result in decision fatigue, which can lead to poor decision-making. 

This is one of the interpersonal skills that really pulls together all the skills. Effective teamwork requires communication skills, the ability to support and respect teammates, the ability to think and learn out loud (for instance, “so what I hear you saying is...” or “if I understand you correctly, you’d like us to…”), and the ability to “listen, really listen,” McGeorge said. “Even better, listen with an intention to have your mind changed.” 

The benefits of effective teamwork stretch beyond accomplishing goals, she added. “When done right, there’s almost an alchemy of unique gifts, talents and skills that can create a competitive advantage and have people feel great about their work,” McGeorge said.

“Employers frequently want you to rely on and help others in order to achieve a common goal,” said Shiv Gupta, CEO of Incrementors , an inbound marketing company based in Sacramento, California. Collaboration means knowing when to step back and be supportive and when to take the lead. Collaboration is also entwined with teamwork. “As a successful team player, you should have a variety of the aforementioned talents, including empathy, respect, bargaining, and communication, as well as a positive attitude,” Gupta said. 

More on Interpersonal Skills How Interpersonal Skills Help You Be a Stronger Tech Player

This interpersonal skill combines assertion and the ability to say no, said Lisa Bahar , an adjunct professor of psychology at Pepperdine University, Malibu, California, and a licensed marriage and family therapist and clinical counselor. 

An example of objective effectiveness in use would be describing a situation, expressing your feelings and opinions, asking for what you want, and then helping the other person understand that what you want benefits both of you. “This is not intended to be manipulative,” Bahar said. “There are also skills, when a person responds, which include being mindful of your objective and learning how to ignore attacks.”  

These skills depend on the ability to use analytical and creative thinking to find solutions, said Amy Zimmerman, chief people officer at Atlanta, Georgia-based digital payment system Relay Payments and cofounder of leadership consultancy PeopleCo . Analysis, persuasion, logical reasoning, persistence, brainstorming and decision-making are all skills required to effectively solve problems, she said. 

It’s a way for two or more parties to find a peaceful solution to a disagreement among them. It’s a five-step process, starting with defining the source of the conflict, looking beyond the incident, requesting solutions, identifying solutions both sides can support, and reaching an agreement, Zimmerman said.

More on Soft Skills Why Engineers Should Sharpen Their Soft Skills Along With Their Technical Skills

This critical skill involves listening to the other party, understanding where they’re coming from as well as what’s important to them, said Andrea Ippolito, CEO and founder of Ithaca, New York-based SimpliFed , a telehealth platform focused on lactation, child nutrition and on-demand support for new parents. 

Successful negotiators identify the ZOPA, or zone of possible agreement, which is the common area on which both sides agree. “By understanding this zone, it allows you to meet somewhere in there for each party to accomplish what they need,” Ippolito said. 

High-quality negotiating skills help get internal and external stakeholders to buy into what you are trying to communicate, said Joe Vu, digital marketing manager at Fairport, New York-based QuickFi , maker of an app that simplifies business-equipment financing. “Using the right data insights and context can help strengthen your negotiation, and ultimately help you become a better communicator and leader,” he said. 

It’s accepting that other people can and will think and behave differently than you do. “Tolerance can be a challenge in the workplace because of individual disagreements or personal biases,” said Sam Cohen, founder of Gold Tree Consulting , a growth marketing agency based in Austin, Texas. Tolerance is acquired through exposure to different points of view and ways of thinking, and also with experience managing changes. “Change is imminent,” Cohen said, recommending meditation and practicing patience to hone tolerance. 

Why Are Interpersonal Skills Important?

Love makes the world go round, and interpersonal skills keep the workplace world spinning properly. Not only that: Interpersonal skills can make a tech professional a standout and help forge a promising career .

During his 27 years in tech, Patrick Hayes has developed, refined and used interpersonal skills as a way to influence outcomes and gain buy-in from others. “I have often been called a ‘people person,’ or someone who can get along well with others,” said Hayes, chief strategy officer at Chicago-based UncommonX , a SaaS-based cybersecurity firm.

Tech professionals, in his opinion, tend to be introverted and rely on facts, data and technical experience to reach decisions. “Developing your interpersonal skills, while it may seem touchy-feely, can be an important aspect of your career growth into leadership and roles with a greater scope of responsibility,” Hayes said. 

Interpersonal skills help soothe a variety of office issues, including disagreements, which can and will happen even in the happiest of workplaces. “Whatever the disagreement is, it’s important to separate the behavior from the individual,” said Hayes. ”As yourself, ‘why does the other person see things this way?’ You might not reach a mutually shared outcome, but this approach will provide the ability to focus on the issue and not the person,” he said.

More on Soft Skills 3 Often-Neglected Soft Skills for Developers to Know

How to Develop Your Interpersonal Skills

To be sure, some people are naturally charismatic and possess a full set of interpersonal skills. Others need to develop and refine interpersonal skills. Miriam Frankel, director of Thrive Group , a Passaic, New Jersey-based counseling center, offers nine tips for doing just that.

Think Positively

Every day, remind yourself of the good things about your life and your job. If you’re upset about a personal matter, set those feelings aside until after work. If you’re stressed about a work issue, look for the positive in the situation and try to build on that.

Control Your Emotions

Work isn’t the place to be overly emotional. Whether you’re extremely irritated, severely depressed or ecstatically happy, take a deep breath and tone your emotions down. Always express yourself in a calm, patient manner.

Acknowledge Others’ Expertise

One of the best ways to build trust at work is to let your co-workers know you appreciate their expertise. Ask for their help on projects and give credit where credit is due.

Show Genuine Interest in Your Colleagues

Make a point of getting to know what’s important to your co-workers. It will help solidify your relationships with them.

Find One Good Trait in Every Co-worker

Not all of us like every single person we work with but you can’t let personal preference get in the way of peak performance. If a colleague’s personality clashes completely with your own, the best way to handle the situation is by finding at least one good trait in that person — preferably something professional.

Practice Active Listening

Maintain eye contact with the speaker, nod your head, and repeat what they have said in your own words. The speaker will feel respected and you’re likely to be able to recall the conversation more easily afterwards.

Be Assertive

Be confident in your ability and opinions, and don’t be afraid to express your needs, as well as your limits.

Practice Empathy

Gain a well-rounded view of things by putting yourself in other people’s shoes. This will help you develop empathy for others, which in turn goes a long way in finding solutions that work for all involved.

Maintain Your Relationships

Connect with college friends and former colleagues on social media or through email; try to set up face-to-face meetings now and then. This shows your connections that you still value the relationship — and that can go a long way in helping you advance your career.

Interpersonal Skills and Impostor Syndrome

Some people might require more time to develop interpersonal skills; others, less. One group of professionals, surprisingly enough, might have highly developed personal skills, yet lack the confidence to recognize them.

That group? People with impostor syndrome — the belief that others think you’re smarter than you think you are.

Impostor syndrome is largely regarded as a professional negative. Yet new research by Basima A. Tewfik , assistant professor of work and organization studies at Massachusetts Institute of Technology’s Sloan School of Management, indicates that those who have “impostor thoughts” might be viewed by others as having better interpersonal skills.

In a paper forthcoming in the Academy of Management Journal , Tewfik “develops a model linking workplace impostor thoughts to other-perceived interpersonal effectiveness,” she writes in the abstract. She posits that people with more impostor thoughts are rated higher in interpersonal effectiveness “because such thoughts make them more other-oriented.”

Perceived interpersonal effectiveness “refers to how well others perceive that one cooperates and interacts with one’s environment,” Tewfik writes in the abstract. People with higher interpersonal effectiveness levels are those who create effective working relationships and relate well to others. 

Because accomplishing things at work increasingly involves interacting with others, having employees low in interpersonal effectiveness can cost workplaces millions of dollars in ill outcomes and mismanaged projects, she writes, citing colleagues’ research on the subject. 

Tewfik tested her theory in four studies with four groups: employees at an investment advisory firm, doctors-in-training and what she calls “two cross-industry sets of employees recruited online.” Members of each group were evaluated for workplace impostor thoughts and interpersonal effectiveness by various means. 

In one employee study, for instance, half of the employees were randomly assigned to recall a time at work in which they had impostor thoughts while the other half were randomly assigned to recall what they had for lunch that day. Employees were all then told to imagine that right after the experience they recalled, they got the chance to have an informal coffee chat with a hiring manager that could result in a promotion. Employees were offered the option of either asking or answering questions during this conversation. 

Tewfik found that those in the “impostor thoughts” group choose to ask more questions. As a result of this increased “other-focus,” hiring managers gave them higher interpersonal effectiveness scores.

In summary? Impostor syndrome might feel like a career liability, but can be a real asset when it comes to getting along in the workplace. And so can a toolbox of well-honed interpersonal skills.

Take a moment each day to perfect these essential skills. Your career will thank you for it.

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Professional Skills

The importance of interpersonal skills in the workplace.

Christopher Thoma

Interpersonal Skills in the Workplace concept

In personal communication, thoughts and emotions are expressed verbally and nonverbally in various ways. It enables interaction with people and understanding what they say in personal and professional situations.

As someone who has first-hand experience managing and nurturing teams, I can confidently affirm the enormous value employers place on an individual's ability to interact and communicate effectively. Employers and managers frequently observe and reward candidates and workers with strong communication skills.

So let's dive right into the importance of interpersonal skills that will benefit your employment, work relationships and overall career success. I've also included some actionable tips to develop them.

Why interpersonal skills are important

Whether a business is booming or lagging, interpersonal or soft skills are imperative. Well-developed interpersonal skills can help ensure your effectiveness and protect your job during uncertain economic conditions. It might not seem like an easy task, but building interpersonal skills in the workplace can make it much more enjoyable and, more importantly, helpful. 

1. They foster effective communication

Having strong interpersonal skills is critical to becoming an effective communicator in any organization. Building relationships with colleagues facilitates the sharing of knowledge and information and the development of new skills and capabilities. Strong communication skills also reduce miscommunications and potential strife stemming from misunderstandings.

Further, this encourages mutual respect and appreciation of each other's viewpoints and contributions. By establishing effective communication , jobs can be completed more efficiently, activities can be managed more effectively, and assignments can be completed more quickly.

2. They keep the feedback loop open

The exchange of information between those who assign jobs and task recipients is vital, and supervisory feedback might reveal if the employee's performance is satisfactory or if improvements are needed. If a manager does not communicate with subordinates and then criticizes them, this is counterproductive and can lead to an unhealthy relationship between management and employees.

3. They expand your opportunities

Characteristics and feedback loops are endless cycles, and supervisors should be able to communicate with their subordinates effectively and foster an environment where people feel comfortable expressing themselves. Similarly, employees should feel comfortable communicating with their superiors, which will lead to stronger relationships and the possibility of advancing your career in the future.

4. They make you relatable

The ability to interact with others significantly enhances your chances of being viewed as approachable by coworkers and managers. Your coworker will feel more comfortable working with you and look to you for advice and assistance more often when you make a conscious effort to improve your interpersonal skills. 

5. They demonstrate social awareness

A good sense of observation and emotional intelligence , for example, can assist you in dealing with a tough social situation. Interpersonal skills can also help you make the best judgments and decisions when dealing with sensitive work-related scenarios and will improve your customer service significantly when it comes to dealing with clients.

6. They improve customer satisfaction

If your career involves dealing with customers or clients , interpersonal skills are something that should be a priority. Everybody knows that customers’ expectations are high, and if communication breaks down between the customer and the company, then things go downhill fast. Improving your interpersonal skills could increase sales, encourage negotiations and leave customers feeling satisfied with the service they’ve received.

7. They build trust

8. they help foster and maintain personal relationships.

Building meaningful connections with others is when interpersonal skills are most effective, helpful, and gratifying. Developing personal relationships at work is essential and maintaining them within professional boundaries is a welcome skill in the workplace.

9. They make you an effective leader

To be a successful leader — whether it’s for a superior role or just showing leadership skills within a team — an individual must establish interpersonal relationships, develop trust, and communicate effectively. 

A lack of communication means a lack of connection within a team. If you don’t communicate effectively, you’re almost certain to fail in the long run, which will ultimately cause team members to leave or create a lack of productivity.

10. They encourage empathy

Aside from their ability to establish connections, excellent interpersonal skills substantially impact group performance and the level of engagement and effective cooperation within a corporate setting.

How to improve your interpersonal skills

Learn from others: Study your coworkers, company leaders, and professionals you admire and respect to develop strong interpersonal skills. Watch and listen to their communication style as well as their body language . Note their voice tone, speech rate, and how they react to other people and see how you can apply these qualities when interacting with others.

Final thoughts

Put your interpersonal skills to the test by interacting with people in situations where developing relationships is possible. Attend events to see how others communicate and behave . 

Let me know if you've found that improving your interpersonal skills helped advance your career in any shape or form? What did you find was the biggest benefit? Leave a comment in the section below!

Essay on Interpersonal Communication Skills

Introduction

Communication has become an integral part of life and must-have skills. We need interpersonal skills not only to interact with each other in the context of the workplace, families, relationships, and nations, but also to transmit information and knowledge. According to Koprowska, (2020), interpersonal communication is defined as exchanging information, knowledge, feelings, and thoughts exchanged between two or more people. Individual use various of communication methods; words, body language, tonal variation, facial expressions, and gestures. Using effective interpersonal communication by an individual helps in personal growth, promotes a close relationship, promotes wellness, reduces stress, and improves the quality of life (Koprowska,2020). This essay focusses on showing the importance of effective interpersonal communication skills and emerging skills learned over the trimester incorporating feedback received from peers.

Paraphrasing and Summarizing

Repeating back in my words what the client said helped to bring the client awareness to his/her cognitions, emotions, and behaviors awareness. It encouraged the client to go deeper into the conversations and demonstrate empathy. According to Koprowska, (2020), paraphrasing and summarizing are more to repeating the words and interpreting the client’s emotions and behavior.

Reflection of content and feeling

Reflection of content involved reflecting back the content of what the client has said by picking the most important content information, but not repeating what the client has said, while the reflection of feeling is reflecting on the perceived emotional affect of the client such as tears or change in the tone (Destler, 2017). Combined reflection of content and feeling to bring feelings, cognitions, and behaviors awareness. Using appropriate words to reflect the client’s content and feelings was crucial to the success of the counseling sessions, for instance, ‘You are sad because of bullying at the work and the decision to leave your family and friends, if you accept the new job offer.’

Active listening skills

Counselors used active listening skills to help the client recognize that the counselor is listening attentively, interested in what the client is talking about, understanding and encouraging the client to continue talking (Geldard, & Foo,2019). Active listening skills include: nonverbal responses such as nodding, maintaining eye contact; using encouragers to continue talking such as ‘yes’, ‘really’, ‘ I understand’ which shows the attitude and approval, or disapproval; matching the language to the appropriate age group such as the use of vocabulary that the client will understand.

Use of questions

Designed the suitable questions at an appropriate time to meet different clients’ need. When working with the adults, one should be careful not to overuse questions to avoid turning the counselling into interrogation but a conversation (Destler,2017). Similarly, to young people to maintain interests in the session. There are two types of questions: an open question seeks a descriptive answer while a closed question demands a yes or no answer. Both types of questions encourage a conversation and make the client to self-disclosure. Moreover, the type of questions asked by the counselor makes him/her approachable and builds trust.

Importance of Effective Interpersonal communication skills

Personal development

Human beings are complex social beings. We develop social skills through continuously interacting with others. Social skills are primarily affected by predisposing factors; thoughts, feelings, and perceptions are learned and shaped by our social groups (Geldard, & Foo,2019). In my role play and course materials provided helped me to develop practical communication skills; listening skills: how to encourage others to talk about themselves without interpreting, experiences and reflection of feelings: early experience affects an individual’s perceptions, and perceptions do not change easily (Biglu, et all.,2017). One can only help another by using effective interpersonal skills to ensure the intended information, the other person understands thoughts. Likewise, interaction requires one to understand the other person’s point of view, as well as your own’s view to give advice by making other person feels that their opinions, thoughts and ideas matter.

The development of effective interpersonal skills has helped me express myself in the most convincingly way; strengthening the bond among my friends; to speak clearly to make people understand what I intend to communicate; improve body language (Biglu, et all.,2017). Apparently, shaping my personality has boosted my self-esteem and self-confidence and in realizing my purpose of helping people in daily challenges.

Problem solving

Different problems require different problem-solving skills. For instance, solving a problem requires understanding the problem and effective verbal, listening, and persuasion skills. Excellent interpersonal communications ensure smooth discussion among the team, weighing the cons and pros of different alternatives and choose the best alternative (Khademian, & Tehrani, 2017).

According to American Psychological Association, 40% of clients do not trust their counselors in the counseling industry. They do not share all the information for fear of confidentiality breaches. Effective communication help to build the trust, relationship in the workplace by assuring, and explaining the obligation of confidentiality in the law.

Personal relationships

Building healthy relationships in the personal and workplace requires effective interpersonal communication skills, coordination to work as a team. Creating and maintaining personal relationships requires respecting other person’s point of view; thoughts, knowledge, ideas, paying attention to their feelings by observing how they communicate, this builds trust among the friends (Khademian, & Tehrani, 2017).

Effective management and leadership

An effective leader should possess skills to foster an interpersonal relationship, trust and communicate clearly. Poor communication irritates and confuses workers while performing their duties, waste time while revisiting issues already shared (Hardjati, & Febrianita,2019). Managers are in charge, should ensure cooperation at executing tasks and responsible for his/her team. Therefore, the need to build trust and transparency by effectively communicating to the employees and creating a culture of positivity.

Recognizing good work

Good interpersonal communication skills are essential for personal coaching in the workplace. Helping each other perform their duties successfully, identifying the good work and encouraging each other to perform their level best as well as working on weaknesses (Biglu, et all.,2017). Asking questions instead of giving direct orders at the workplace requires effective interpersonal communication skills.

Must-Have Interpersonal Communication skills

Employees are recognizing the importance of micro-soft skills and nonverbal communication skills. The following are soft skills and nonverbal communication skills I have gained or polished include; communication courtesy, flexibility, integrity, interpersonal skills, attitude, professionalism, responsibility, teamwork, and work ethic (Biglu, et all.,2017).

Importance of observing non-verbal clues

Nonverbal clues; facial expressions, gestures, body movement and postures, eye contact, tone variation are powerful interpersonal communication tools. Observing the nonverbal clues helped me know when to start a conversation by establishing a rapport; someone needed a break, was confused hence need more explanation, want to contribute, and know whether trust exists in the discussion (Anggeraini, & Farozin,2019).

Ineffective interpersonal communication

Ineffective interpersonal create barriers and prevent the sharing and understanding of message communicated. In cases where people are restricted to sharing by cultural taboos of non-talking issues, mainly caused by lack of trust, frustration, and problems neglected (Khademian, & Tehrani, 2017). To show respect for their culture and talk openly about how they have restricted people from talking, and encourage cooperation.

Poor conflict management and problem-solving skills result in finger-pointing, blaming each other for not achieving the set objectives, and misdirected anger to other team members. According to Koprowska, (2020), can solve this by learning how to bring people’s mistakes indirectly, not pointing fingers. The manager can talk about his/her mistakes before criticizing the other person, and learning to disagree with the other person’s perceptions, and remaining calm.

It is satisfactory to say that effective interpersonal communication skills are essential towards achieving goals in an organization and personal development. Employees exhibit poor performance at the workplace as a result of ineffective interpersonal communication from the manager. The directives from the leaders ensure the proper performance of duties at the workplace. Effective interpersonal communication skills enhance personal and professional growth, builds trust and positivity, recognizes good work and effective management. This enhances the reliability and accuracy of information thus yielding an efficient working environment.

Destler, D. (2017). The Superskills Model: A Supervisory Microskill Competency Training Model.  Professional Counselor ,  7 (3), 272-284.

Geldard, K., Geldard, D., & Foo, R. Y. (2019).  Counselling adolescents: The proactive approach for young people . Sage.

Hardjati, S., & Febrianita, R. (2019). The power of interpersonal communication skill in enhancing service provision.  Journal of Social Science Research ,  14 , 3192-3199.

Khademian, Z., & Tehrani Neshat, B. (2017). The relationship between interpersonal communication skills and nursing students’ attitudes toward teamwork.  Sadra Medical Journal ,  5 (2), 99-110.

Biglu, M. H., Nateq, F., Ghojazadeh, M., & Asgharzadeh, A. (2017). Communication skills of physicians and patients’ satisfaction.  Materia socio-medica ,  29 (3), 192.

Anggeraini, D., & Farozin, M. (2019). Interpersonal communication skills and self confidence of secondary school students: findings and interventions.  KnE Social Sciences , 140-145.

Koprowska, J. (2020).  Communication and interpersonal skills in social work . Sage.

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Interpersonal Effectiveness: 9 Worksheets & Examples (+ PDF)

Interpersonal Effectiveness: 9 Worksheets & Examples (+ PDF)

There is a myriad of skills that can be added to our repertoire, enhanced, and improved.

There are thousands of courses, millions of books and articles, and countless tips and suggestions to improve our lives by cultivating a certain skill or set of skills.

But which one is most important?

There may not be a definitive answer to that question, but I think one of the most common answers would be: communication (or interpersonal) skills.

It is simply a fact of life that we will encounter thousands, even tens of thousands, of people in our lifetime. While we don’t need to make a good impression on each individual we meet (which would be an impossible task anyway), we do need to at least get along with others well enough to get by.

This is especially true for those of us struggling with a mental disorder like depression, anxiety, or Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). It can be doubly difficult for people with these obstacles to effectively interact with others.

Fortunately, there are ways to enhance your interpersonal effectiveness. Whether you are a successful public speaker or an introverted loner, there are resources and activities that can help you improve your communication skills and enhance your quality of life.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Positive Relationships Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will help you or your clients build healthy, life-enriching relationships.

This Article Contains:

What is the definition of interpersonal effectiveness, interpersonal effectiveness & dialectical behavioral therapy, the importance of developing your interpersonal effectiveness skills, 6 games & activities (for groups) to develop effective interpersonal skills, 3 ways to improve your interpersonal effectiveness in the workplace, a take-home message.

Interpersonal effectiveness, at its most basic, refers to the ability to interact with others. It includes skills we use to (Vivyan, 2015):

  • Attend to relationships
  • Balance priorities versus demands
  • Balance the “wants” and the “shoulds”
  • Build a sense of mastery and self-respect

Our ability to interact with others can be broken by the goal we have in mind for our interactions. There are three main goals to interaction:

  • Gaining our objective
  • Maintaining our relationships
  • Keeping our self-respect

Each goal requires interpersonal skills; while some interpersonal skills will be applied in many situations, some skills will be especially important for achieving one of these goals.

When we are working towards gaining our objective, we need skills that involve clarifying what we want from the interaction, and identifying what we need to do in order to get the results we want.

When maintaining our relationships is our first priority, we need to understand how important the particular relationship is to us, how we want the person to feel about us, and what we need to do in order to keep the relationship going.

Finally, when our goal is to keep our self-respect, we will use interpersonal skills to help us feel the way we would like to feel after the interaction is over and to stick to our values and to the truth (Vivyan, 2015).

6 Games & Activities (for Groups) to Develop Effective Interpersonal Skills

In fact, it’s the second core skills module in classic DBT, with tons of materials and resources dedicated to improving the client’s interpersonal skills.

You might be wondering why interpersonal effectiveness is so important that it warrants an entire module in one of the most popular forms of therapy. Sure, communication is important, but does it really require this much time and effort? Why?

DBT’s take is that these skills are so important because the way we communicate with others has a huge impact on the quality of our relationships with others and the outcomes of our interactions with others (Linehan, 2015). In turn, the quality of our relationships and the outcomes of our interactions have a significant influence on our wellbeing , our sense of self-esteem and self-confidence , and our very understanding of who we are.

While there are many skills related to communication and interaction with others, DBT focuses on two main components:

  • The ability to ask for things that you want or need
  • The ability to say no to requests, when appropriate

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By now, you have surely recognized the importance of having good, or at least adequate, communication and interaction skills. However, you may be thinking that if you have the skills to communicate with others at a minimum level of effectiveness, you’re set! Why bother working on skills you already have?

Like any set of complex skills, there will never be a point at which you have completely mastered them. Even the best motivational speakers and public relations experts are not perfect communicators. There is always room for improvement!

Research has provided evidence that improving these interpersonal skills leads to positive outcomes, especially for clients with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). For example, DBT skill utilization has been shown to improve BPD symptoms overall, reduce affective instability, and improve the client’s relationship capabilities (Stepp, Epler, Jahng, & Trull, 2008).

The ultimate guide to expert interpersonal skills – Science of People

While there are many worksheets and individual exercises you can engage in to build your interpersonal skills, they are not always the most effective way to do this.

It’s no surprise that the best way to improve your interactions with others is to practice interacting with others!

Not only are group activities generally more effective in improving interpersonal skills, they are often more fun. Below, we’ve listed and described 5 fun games and activities that you can practice to improve your interpersonal effectiveness (as well as one handout you can use to assess your interpersonal skills).

Skills Assessment Handout

Before trying to improve your interpersonal communication skills, it is a good idea to find out where you currently are with each one. The assessment on page 3 of this handout can help.

On this page, you will find 29 skills, such as:

  • Introducing yourself
  • Listening – taking in what people say
  • Listening – showing interest in people
  • Responding to praise
  • Responding to negative feedback
  • Self-disclosure as appropriate

For each skill, you are instructed to rate yourself on a scale from 1 to 5, according to the following rubric:

  • 1 – I am very poor at that skill
  • 2 – I am poor
  • 3 – I am sometimes good
  • 4 – I am usually good
  • 5 – I am always good

You can take the average of your ratings to give yourself an overall “interpersonal effectiveness” skill rating, but the individual ratings are valuable by themselves.

If you are looking to enhance your communication skills, make sure to establish a baseline first. If you have a baseline to compare back to, it is much easier to notice improvements!

Try Not To Listen Activity

In this fun and potentially eye-opening activity, group members will get a chance to put their acting chops to the test.

The group should be broken into pairs for this activity. In each pair, one individual should be designated to speak first while the other “listens,” before switching roles.

The first speaker (Partner A) is instructed to talk for two minutes straight, about any subject they’d like to talk about. While Partner A is speaking, Partner B’s job is to make it crystal clear that he or she is not listening to Partner A at all.

Partner B cannot say anything, instead relying on body language to communicate their message to Partner A.

Once Partner A’s two minutes of speaking time is up, Partner B gets two minutes to talk while Partner A “listens.”

The group will likely find that it is extremely hard to keep talking when their partner is so clearly not listening! This is an important lesson from the activity: that body language plays a vital role in communication, and listeners have a significant influence over how the interaction goes in addition to those speaking.

Once all group members have taken their turn both speaking and “listening,” each individual should write down their immediate reactions to having a speaking partner that is clearly not listening.

They will probably come up with feelings like:

  • I felt frustrated.
  • I was angry.
  • I felt that I wasn’t important.
  • I felt like what I was saying must be boring.
  • I couldn’t keep talking.
  • I felt insignificant and unimportant.

Next, group members should note the behaviors that their partner was exhibiting to show that they weren’t listening, behaviors like:

  • Facing away, with head bent toward the floor or turned to the side
  • Avoiding eye contact
  • Looking at the floor/ceiling
  • Folded arms/crossed legs
  • Blank or bored expression
  • Yawning, whistling, scratching or other activity incompatible with active listening
  • Preoccupation (with looking at one’s surroundings, one’s phone, etc.)
  • No interaction at all

While this exercise is clearly an exaggeration of what it is like to talk to someone who isn’t listening, this can help those who are not very observant or limited in their social skills to monitor their own behavior when interacting with others.

It’s easy to decide to practice active listening in your interactions, but it’s harder to keep all of the target behaviors (and all of the decidedly non-target behaviors) in mind. Practicing this exercise will help participants identify and remember the behaviors that make a person a good listener .

You can find this exercise on page 4 of the handout mentioned above ( Interpersonal Skills Exercises ).

Sabotage Exercise

This is another fun exercise that incorporates poor interpersonal behaviors in order to highlight what the good interpersonal behaviors are.

This exercise should be undertaken in a fairly large group, large enough to break into at least two or three groups of four to five individuals.

Instruct each group to take about 10 minutes to brainstorm, discuss, and list all the ways they can think of to sabotage a group assignment. Anything they can think of is fair game – it just needs to be something disruptive enough to drive a team task right off the rails!

Once each group has a good-sized list of ways to sabotage a group assignment, gather into the larger group again and compare responses. Write them all on the chalkboard, whiteboard, or a flip board in the front of the room.

Next, reform the groups and instruct them to produce a 5- to 10-point contract with agreed-upon guidelines for successful group work. Group members should draw from the sabotage ideas (i.e., what not to do for successful group work) to identify good ideas (i.e., what to do for successful group work).

For example, if a group listed “do not communicate with any of the other group members” as a way to sabotage the group assignment, they might come up with something like “communicate with other group members often” as a guideline for successful group work.

This exercise will help participants learn what makes for a positive group experience, while also giving them a chance to have a positive group experience along the way.

This exercise was described on page 14 of  this handout .

Group Strengths and Weaknesses

Groups have one very important advantage over individuals when it comes to accomplishing work – they can offset individuals’ weaknesses, complement their strengths, and bring balance to the group.

Group members will engage in some critical thinking and discussion about their own strengths and weaknesses in this exercise, as well as the strengths and weaknesses of the other group members and the group as a whole.

To give this exercise a try, instruct the group to think about the strengths and weaknesses of each individual group member. Encourage them to be honest but kind to one another, especially when discussing weaknesses.

Once each team has come up with a good list of strengths and weaknesses for each group member, have each group think about how these will affect group dynamics. What strengths will positively influence group interactions? Which weaknesses have the potential to throw a monkey wrench into group interactions?

Finally, have each team discuss the composition of a “perfect” team. Is it better to have members with similar characteristics or with a wide range of personalities, abilities, and skills? What are the advantages and disadvantages of each type of team?

This discussion will help participants think critically about what makes a good team, how different personalities interact, and how to modify your behavior, group norms, or expectations to match the differing personalities and abilities of others.

This exercise is also described on page 14 of the handout on interpersonal skills ( Interpersonal Skills Exercises ).

essay on interpersonal skills

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Count the Squares

This game is a fun and engaging way to encourage group interaction and communication.

All you need is this image (or similar image of multiple squares), displayed on a PowerPoint presentation or on the wall or board at the front of the room.

In the first step, give the group a couple of minutes to individually count the number of squares in the figure and write down their answer. They should do this without speaking to others.

Next, have each group member call out the number of squares they counted. Write these down on the board.

Now instruct each participant to find someone to pair up with and count the squares again. They can talk to each other when determining how many squares there are, but no one else.

Have each pair share their number again once they are finished.

Finally, have the participants form groups of four to five members each and instruct them to count the squares one more time. When they have finished, once again take down the numbers each group counted.

At least one group will almost certainly have counted the correct number of squares, which is 40. Have this group walk the rest of the participants through how they got to 40.

Finally, lead the whole group through a discussion of group synergy, and why the counts (likely) kept getting closer and closer to 40 as more people got together to solve the problem.

Participants will learn about the importance of good group communication, practice working in pairs and in groups, and hopefully have fun completing this activity.

You can find more information about this activity here .

Non-Verbal Introduction Game

This game is a fun twist on an old classic – meeting a new person and introducing them to the group.

You should plan this game on the first day of a group therapy , training, or other activity to take advantage of the opportunity to introduce each group member.

Have the group members pair up with a person sitting next to them. Tell them to introduce themselves to each other and include something interesting or unusual about themselves.

Once every pair has been introduced and has found out something interesting about the other person, bring the focus back to the larger group.

Tell the group members that each person must introduce their partner to the group, but with a catch – they cannot use words or props! Each partner must introduce the other partner with actions only.

This game is not only a great icebreaker for introducing people to one another, it’s also a fun way for group members to see both the utility of verbal communication (something you might only recognize when cannot use it!) and the importance of nonverbal communication.

If you have time, you can lead the group in a discussion of nonverbal communication, the cues we pick up on in other peoples’ behavior, and how getting feedback from those you are communicating with is vital.

You can read more about this game here .

Non-Verbal Introduction Game interpersonal skills

Luckily, most of these skills transfer nicely from therapy to family life, interactions with friends, and the workplace. Additionally, there are some exercises and resources developed to improve work-related interpersonal skills directly.

Below you will find a few different ways to improve your communication at work .

Interpersonal Effectiveness Skills Handout

This helpful handout can be reviewed and returned to while you or your client are working on enhancing interpersonal effectiveness.

It outlines the skills needed to communicate effectively with others, separated into three different skill sets:

  • Objective Effectiveness
  • Relationship Effectiveness
  • Self-Respect Effectiveness

For each set, there is a handy acronym to help you remember which skills are included.

For objective effectiveness, the acronym is “DEAR MAN” and the skills are:

  • D – Describe: use clear and concrete terms to describe what you want.
  • E – Express: let others know how a situation makes you feel by clearly expressing your feelings; don’t expect others to read your mind.
  • A – Assert: don’t beat around the bush – say what you need to say.
  • R – Reinforce: reward people who respond well, and reinforce why your desired outcome is positive.
  • M – Mindful : don’t forget the objective of the interaction; it can be easy to get sidetracked into harmful arguments and lose focus.
  • A – Appear: appear confident; consider your posture, tone, eye contact, and body language.
  • N – Negotiate: no one can have everything they want out of an interaction all the time; be open to negotiation.

These skills allow those who practice them to effectively and clearly express their needs and desires, and get what they want out of an interaction.

The acronym for relationship effectiveness is “GIVE”:

  • G – Gentle: don’t attack, threaten, or express judgment during your interactions; accept the occasional “no” for your requests.
  • I – Interested: show interest by listening to the other person without interrupting.
  • V – Validate: be outwardly validating to the other person’s thoughts and feelings; acknowledge their feelings, recognize when your requests are demanding, and respect their opinions.
  • E – Easy: have an easy attitude; try to smile and act lighthearted.

These skills help people to maintain relationships with others through fostering positive interactions.

Finally, the acronym for self-respect effectiveness is “FAST”:

  • F – Fair: be fair; not only to others but also to yourself.
  • A – Apologies: don’t apologize unless it’s warranted; don’t apologize for making a request, having an opinion, or disagreeing.
  • S – Stick to Values: don’t compromise your values just to be liked or to get what you want; stand up for what you believe in.
  • T – Truthful: avoid dishonesty such as exaggeration, acting helpless as a form of manipulation, or outright lying.

The self-respect skill set will help protect you from betraying your own values and beliefs to receive approval or to get what you want.

Knowing what these skills are and how they can be applied is the first step towards enhancing your ability to interact with others. You can find this handout online at this link .

Radical Acceptance Worksheet

This worksheet helps you to identify and understand a situation you are struggling to accept, whether it is at work, in your personal life, an issue with your family, or something else entirely. Whatever difficult thing you are working through, you can use this worksheet to help yourself accept the reality of your situation .

First, the worksheet instructs you to answer the question “What is the problem or situation?”

Next, you will describe the part of this situation that is difficult for you to accept.

Then, you describe the reality of that situation. Think critically here about the reality, don’t just write down what you want the situation to be or what your worst possible interpretation of the situation is.

After describing the reality, think about the causes that led up that reality (hint: you will probably notice that many of them are outside of your control!).

Next, you practice acceptance with the whole self (mind, body, and spirit) and describe how you did this. The worksheet encourages you to try the following:

“Breathe deeply, put your body into an open, accepting posture, and notice and let go of thoughts and feelings that fight the reality. Practice skills for acceptance such as half-smile, awareness exercises, or prayer. Focus on a statement of acceptance, such as “it is what it is” or “everything is as it should be.”

Finally, you rate your distress tolerance about this difficult situation both before and after practicing radical acceptance, on a scale from 0 (you just can’t take it) to 100 (total acceptance of reality).

This worksheet will be available for download soon.

Compass Points Emotional Intelligence Activity

This exercise from the National School Reform Faculty is a fantastic way for a team to improve their emotional intelligence together (Allen, 2015).

To prepare for this exercise, create four signs – North, South, East, and West – and post them on the room walls. Under each point, write out the traits associated with each sign:

  • North: Acting o Likes to act, try things, dive in; “Let’s do it!”
  • East: Speculating o Likes to look at the big picture and all the possibilities before acting.
  • South: Caring o Likes to know that everyone’s feelings have been taken into consideration and that their voices have been heard before acting.
  • West: Paying Attention to Detail o Likes to know the who, what, when, where, and why before acting.

To begin the activity, point out the four points to the participants and ask them to read each one and select the one that most accurately captures how they work with others on teams. Have them walk over to that point and remain there for the activity.

Once each participant has chosen a compass point, ask them to recall a personal past team experience that was either very positive or very negative. They shouldn’t share this experience yet, but they should keep it in mind to discuss later.

Next, have the natural groups (formed by compass point selection) designate three positions amongst themselves:

  • Recorder – to record the responses of the group
  • Timekeeper – to keep the group members on task
  • Spokesperson – to share out on behalf of the group when time is up

Once the roles have been assigned, provide 5 to 8 minutes for the teams to respond to the following questions:

  • What are the strengths of your style?
  • What are the limitations of your style?
  • What style do you find most difficult to work with and why?
  • What do people from other “directions” or styles need to know about you so you can work together effectively?
  • What’s one thing you value about each of the other three styles?

Once each team has discussed these five questions and come up with something to share with the larger group, have them share their responses out. You may hear things like:

  • North gets impatient with West’s need for details.
  • West gets frustrated by North’s tendency to act before planning.
  • South group members crave personal connections and get uncomfortable when team members’ emotional needs aren’t met.
  • East group members get bored when West gets mired in details; East gets frustrated when North dives in before agreeing on big goals.

Once participants have shared their responses to the five questions, ask them to recall their very positive or very negative team experience. Tell them to take a moment or two to reflect on whether there was anything they learned from this exercise that helps them to better understand why their positive team experience was positive, or why their negative team experience was negative. This can be a great way to provoke some “a-ha!” moments (Allen, 2015).

Finally, shift to the conclusion of the exercise and give participants a few minutes to share their key takeaways from the exercise. Different groups will highlight different takeaways, but make sure to point these out if no one brings them up:

  • This activity increases our awareness of our own and others’ preferences.
  • Increased awareness opens the door to empathy.
  • Our preferences have their strengths and limitations.
  • A diversity of preferences is what makes for better teamwork and results.

You can find more information on this exercise here .

essay on interpersonal skills

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Empower others with the skills to cultivate fulfilling, rewarding relationships and enhance their social wellbeing with these 17 Positive Relationships Exercises [PDF].

Created by experts. 100% Science-based.

In this piece, we defined interpersonal effectiveness, described its importance in terms of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy , and provided several ways for you or your clients to work on improving interpersonal skills.

I hope I communicated my message clearly in this piece, and I hope you found a valuable takeaway from reading it. If you learned something particularly useful, what was it? Do you have other activities or exercises you use to keep your interpersonal skills sharp? Let us know in the comments!

Thanks for reading, and happy skill-building!

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Positive Relationships Exercises for free .

  • Allen, G. (2015). A simple exercise to strengthen emotional intelligence in teams. Mind Shift. Retrieved from https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/2015/06/22/a-simple-exercise-to-strengthen-emotional-intelligence-in-teams/
  • Linehan, M. M. (2015).  DBT skills training manual (2nd ed.). New York, NY: Guilford Press.
  • Stepp, S. D., Epler, A. J., Jahng, S., & Trull, T. J. (2008). The effect of dialectical behavior therapy skills use on borderline personality disorder features.  Journal of Personality Disorders ,  22 (6), 549-563.
  • Vivyan, C. (2015). Interpersonal effectiveness: Getting on with others using DBT. Get Self Help UK. Retrieved from https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/interpersonal.htm

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Interpersonal Skills Essay [IELTS Writing Task 2]

Posted by David S. Wills | May 16, 2022 | IELTS Tips , Writing | 1

Interpersonal Skills Essay [IELTS Writing Task 2]

Today, I want to show you a sample band 9 answer for an IELTS writing task 2 question that discusses interpersonal skills. I’ll try and show you a little vocabulary and grammar, as well as how to handle some issues of structure.

Note that if you want feedback on your essays, you should try my writing correction service .

Analysing the Question

Before we begin planning or writing, we must always analyse the question. Here’s our question for today:

Many businesses think that the new employees who have just graduated from schools lack interpersonal skills, such as working with colleagues as a team. What has caused this and what are the solutions to this problem?

This is a cause and solution questio n, as we can see from the second part. The main topic, of course, is the supposed lack of interpersonal skills in recent graduates. Thus, we must write about:

  • Why recent graduates lack interpersonal skills.
  • What can be done to give graduates more interpersonal skills.

We need to think of realistic answers and specifically ones that we can develop a little. It is not a good idea to list 10 reasons why graduates don’t have these skills. Instead, focus on one or two, with plenty of explanation and maybe examples.

Likewise, your solutions should be realistic. Some people use really silly ones, like “Governments should force all graduates to study interpersonal skills.” This is not likely and is hard to justify and explain.

Note also that this is not an opinion essay , so you can’t say anything like “I disagree that graduates lack interpersonal skills…”

Planning your Essay

For my essay, I will argue that universities put too much emphasis on theoretical knowledge. I feel that this would be easy to explain, but more importantly it is also easy to suggest a realistic solution – that universities then incorporate more groupwork into their curricula.

Therefore, I will structure my essay like this:

IntroductionState the main idea
Give an essay outline
Body paragraph 1Say that there’s too much theoretical knowledge
Explain
Body paragraph 2Say that there should be alternatives to theoretical knowledge
Explain how groupwork would help
ConclusionSummarise the essay

This is really easy because cause and solution essays can almost always be divided like this – BP 1 for the causes and BP 2 for the solutions. Simple!

ielts writing task 2 essay structure for cause and solution

I have also chosen just one idea for each body paragraph. This allows me to develop those ideas carefully. It is not good to list lots of ideas or name one, say a little, and move on to the next. It is better to choose the strongest idea and explain it intelligently.

This essay touches on the topics of education and business, so we should think of related vocabulary. Specifically, we should think about good words and phrases for people working together. Think “groupwork” and “teamwork” and “cooperation.” These are exactly the sorts of terms that would fit well into this essay. This sort of essay would also benefit from good language related to causing and solving problems.

Here are some words and phrases I will use in my essay:

  • the modern workplace
  • theoretical knowledge
  • university faculties
  • implement solutions
  • group presentation
  • communicative abilities
  • group-based tasks

These are all going to be really helpful for giving precise and effective ideas. We can see how I will use them in the next section.

Sample Band 9 Answer

It is claimed by some business owners and recruiters that graduates nowadays tend to lack interpersonal skills. This essay will first explore why this is the case before then suggesting how it may be remedied.

If it is true that graduates now lack the interpersonal skills necessary to succeed in the modern workplace, then that surely can be blamed on the exceptionally high level of theoretical knowledge necessary to achieve a good degree. As universities have become more competitive, the requirements for achieving a degree have gotten much more stringent, and students are required to spend all their time reading books and preparing for difficult assessments. It seems likely that this hinders their opportunities to socialise or work with others on productive tasks.

Solving this problem should not be terribly difficult. In fact, university faculties should pay attention to these complaints and implement solutions into their courses. Perhaps the most obvious suggestion is that students must be required to participate in more group activities throughout their education. For example, rather than studying all day and night to write an essay or sit an exam, students could be asked to prepare a group presentation together with their peers. Ideally, these groups should be picked at random to ensure that students develop the necessary skills to work with others whom they would not have previously chosen to work.

In conclusion, it appears that universities are failing students by not educating them in how to develop their interpersonal skills, and as a result they are struggling in the workplace. These universities should thus require students to develop their communicative abilities through specific group-based tasks.

Notes on Grammar

Because this sort of essay deals with general truths – ie discussing how things currently are – I have mostly used the present simple tense. You shouldn’t try to complicate things beyond that, but definitely it is important to use other tenses when they are needed.

You’ll see in my introduction that I referred to the body of the essay by using the future simple tense:

  • This essay will first explore

This is actually quite common. Because the reader is reading that sentence and then next paragraphs come later, it makes sense to use the future simple here.

Later, I used the present perfect for something that had begun in the past but continues now in the present:

  • universities have become more competitive

I have also used modals effectively in order to give suggestions:

  • university faculties should pay attention to these complaints and implement solutions
  • These universities should thus require students to develop their communicative abilities

Some people think that you need bizarre and complex grammatical structures, but actually what you need most is accuracy, which I have used here.

Finally… are sample essays really helpful? I hope this one was! But find out my full thoughts here:

About The Author

David S. Wills

David S. Wills

David S. Wills is the author of Scientologist! William S. Burroughs and the 'Weird Cult' and the founder/editor of Beatdom literary journal. He lives and works in rural Cambodia and loves to travel. He has worked as an IELTS tutor since 2010, has completed both TEFL and CELTA courses, and has a certificate from Cambridge for Teaching Writing. David has worked in many different countries, and for several years designed a writing course for the University of Worcester. In 2018, he wrote the popular IELTS handbook, Grammar for IELTS Writing and he has since written two other books about IELTS. His other IELTS website is called IELTS Teaching.

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Intrapersonal and Interpersonal Skills Essay

  • To find inspiration for your paper and overcome writer’s block
  • As a source of information (ensure proper referencing)
  • As a template for you assignment

Introduction

Intrapersonal skills, interpersonal skills, comparison and contrast between intrapersonal and interpersonal skills.

Below, you will discover an interpersonal and intrapersonal essay that discusses the differences between the communication skills.

The distinction that exists between intrapersonal and interpersonal skills has to do with the fact that while intrapersonal skills are those used by the communicator to communicate to himself or herself, interpersonal skills are employed when communicating with an audience. As human beings, we live in an environment populated with other people and as such, interpersonal skills are vital for relaying what we know or feel to those who listen to us.

Considering the importance of communication, leaders must cultivate effective intrapersonal and interpersonal skills in order to realize maximum output from their inputs. This paper presents a discussion that compares and contrasts intrapersonal and interpersonal skills.

As has already been stated, intrapersonal skills are those skills that we use to communicate with ourselves. Apparently, a communicator may need to first communicate to him or herself before the communication can eventually get to the listener. In the process of communicating to others, a desire to communicate is first aroused and this is then followed by the engagement of the brain.

The tongue is then used to pass on the communication to whoever is listening. In some instances, however, the relaying of the message may be done using gestures. During intrapersonal communication, only one person is involved and the communicator and recipient of the message is the same person.

In the development of intrapersonal skills, it is imperative for one to understand the various mechanisms that affect their emotions and behaviors. By understanding the connection that exists between one’s emotions, behaviors, and actions, it becomes easy to choose the right action when faced with a situation. Clearly, this is important if one has to avoid conflict and confusion.

The development of interpersonal skills is a very important consideration for leaders if they have to achieve their goals and objectives in what they do. To enhance communication with others, a number of things must happen. First, it is important to understand the need to behave appropriately in order to motivate listeners toward greater achievements. Next, the communicator must become aware of any mistakes that may arise and endeavor to correct them. Through constant learning and correction, one is able to move to the next stage where he or she is aware of the progress being made. Finally, the art of communicating to listeners becomes ingrained and the communicator unconsciously communicates effectively.

While intrapersonal and interpersonal skills differ as far as the intended audience is concerned, there is a link between them. Intrapersonal skills enable the communicator to communicate to him or herself while interpersonal skills enable the communicator to convey a message to his or her listeners.

However, before any communication is relayed to a listener, it is first conceived in the communicator’s mind and later sent to the brain for processing. It is after the message has been processed that it is communicated to the listener through an appropriate communication channel. It is thus important for leaders to ensure that both intrapersonal and interpersonal skills are well developed.

Considering that human beings do not exist in isolation, it is an important requirement that everyone should build and strengthen both intrapersonal and interpersonal skills. For leaders, developing these skills enables them to realize greater results from their endeavors. As has been explained, intrapersonal and interpersonal forms of communication complement each other. It is thus critical to develop one without neglecting the other.

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IvyPanda. (2019, June 11). Intrapersonal and Interpersonal Skills Essay. https://ivypanda.com/essays/intrapersonal-and-interpersonal-skills/

"Intrapersonal and Interpersonal Skills Essay." IvyPanda , 11 June 2019, ivypanda.com/essays/intrapersonal-and-interpersonal-skills/.

IvyPanda . (2019) 'Intrapersonal and Interpersonal Skills Essay'. 11 June.

IvyPanda . 2019. "Intrapersonal and Interpersonal Skills Essay." June 11, 2019. https://ivypanda.com/essays/intrapersonal-and-interpersonal-skills/.

1. IvyPanda . "Intrapersonal and Interpersonal Skills Essay." June 11, 2019. https://ivypanda.com/essays/intrapersonal-and-interpersonal-skills/.

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